fry on a beach with a bunch of other falang (westerners)

sit in a deck-chair under a tree and eat some fish

make friends with a gang of Thais listening to Thai folk songs

ride through the jungle on an elephant and sleep in a little hilltribe village

go on a Thai cookery course for a day

raft down a river

explore mangrove swamps in a sea canoe

whizz around a bay on a banana boat

watch some girls firing darts from places where the sun don't shine

pootle around some old ruined Buddhist temples

get a traditional Thai massage

get an "ancient" massage (see "World's Oldest Profession")

spend 4 hours and 600B with 3 friends demolishing the best seafood you've ever had

spend the whole holiday avoiding a MacDonalds

feed some fruit to some monkeys

get roaring drunk every night and pick up - or get picked up by - some bar girls

hang around with some stupid hippies getting stoned and attending full-moon parties

sing "Hotel California" in a Thai karaoke bar

go snorkelling in clear blue warm water with 30m visibility

eat fresh fruits you've never even heard of before

lose the use of your limbs by drinking Thai whisky

attend a festival where everyone gets drunk and throws water at everyone else

spend an eye-popping hour exploring an Asian market

eat something that looks disgusting, but turns out to be ok

visit Royal palaces with glittering gold domes

spend a week in a bamboo hut

spend a few days in a luxury hotel

hang some jasmine flowers around your neck

visit the prisoner-of-war cemeteries near the Bridge over the River Kwai

whistle "Colonel Bogey" as the train crosses the bridge   

gaze at outlandish limestone karsts rising from the sea

spend three or four weeks smiling and nodding at everyone you meet

hire a big pink jeep with yellow spotlights and pretend to be an idiot for a day

equip yourself with a very cold beer and watch the world go by